THE DUCK IS DEAD
A woman brought a very limp
duck into a veterinary surgeon. As she laid her pet on
the table, the vet pulled out his stethoscope and
listened to the bird's chest.
After a moment or two,
the vet shook his head sadly and said, "I'm sorry,
your duck, Cuddles, has passed
away."
The distressed woman wailed,
"Are you sure?"
"Yes, I am sure. The
duck is dead," replied the
vet.
"How can you be so
sure?" she protested.. "I mean you haven't
done any testing on him or anything. He might just
be in a coma or
something."
The vet rolled his eyes,
turned around and left the room.
He returned a few minutes
later with a black Labrador
Retriever.
As the duck's owner
looked on in amazement, the dog stood on his hind
legs, put his front paws on the examination table and
sniffed the duck from top to
bottom. He then looked up at the vet with sad eyes
and shook his head.
The vet patted the dog on
the head and took it out of the
room.
A few minutes later he
returned with a cat.
The cat jumped on the table
and also
delicately sniffed the bird from head to foot. The
cat sat back on its haunches, shook its head, meowed
softly and strolled out of the room.
The vet looked at the
woman and said, "I'm sorry, but as I said,
this is most definitely, 100% certifiably, a dead
duck."
The vet turned to his
computer terminal, hit a few keys and produced a bill,
which he handed to the woman.
The duck's owner, still
in shock, took the bill.
"250?" she cried,
"250 just to tell me my duck is
dead?"
The vet shrugged,
"I'm sorry. If you had just taken my word for
it, the bill would have been 20, but
with the Lab Report and the Cat Scan, it's now
250."